My wife and I have had our share of marital conflict around Thanksgiving Day. The conflict was usually around where to celebrate the holiday. It’s not unusual for couples to have conflicts over this. One partner wants to celebrate the holiday with her family, and he wants to celebrate with his. Or, one partner wants to stay home […]
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Satisfied spouses avoid using this word. This word’s overuse results in unnecessary marital conflict. When the word I used to the extreme it cultivates marital dissatisfaction. Husbands and wives who use this word a lot shut the door to intimacy. They undermine the possibility of romance in their relationship.Remember what it was like when…Recall a time […]
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Not too many years ago, I was at least 40 pounds overweight. I don’t know if my wife ever thought it, but I know she never said, “You’re fat.” She never told me, “You need to lose weight.” So, what is a wife to do when her husband is fat? Do what my wife did. My wife continued […]
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What are the most important qualities for creating a satisfying marriage? When identifying preferred traits in a marriage partner, most American women say they want a spouse who has a steady job. Most American men say they want a spouse who shares similar ideas about having and raising children. This is according to a recent […]
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The combination of certain personality traits in a married couple predicts their marital satisfaction, according to researchers. Behavioral scientists define personality by a handful of traits called “The Big Five.” These traits are:Openness to new experiencesConscientiousnessExtroversionAgreeablenessNeuroticism The Big Five Personality TestSimple questionnaires, such as UC Berkeley’s The Big Five Inventory, measure to what degree a person possesses […]
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Criticism seemed unavoidable in Jeff and Nicole’s marriage. It even crept into discussions about issues that seemed relatively insignificant. Nicole often found almost-empty milk cartons on the shelf of the kitchen refrigerator. “Jeff, is it really that difficult to finish the last few drops of milk and put the carton in recycling?” She knew Jeff put […]
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Few things in life stir up positive and negative emotions as much as the exchanges that occur between a husband and a wife. No one keeps track on a ledger, but those exchanges between spouses always result in deposits in and withdrawals from their individual emotional bank accounts. A happy marriage depends on a couple […]
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On their wedding day, many couples participate in the exchange of marriage vows. This traditional exchange of promises between soon-to-be husband and wife began as early as the sixteenth century. The vows to love and cherish till death do us part appear in Church of England’s first Book of Common Prayer. I admit that I’ve long […]
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An emotionally intelligent husband knows when to accept influence from his wife. By accepting her influence, he increases the chances that he and his wife will share a long and happy marriage. Emotional intelligence is measured by two components. It begins with a person’s ability to recognize, understand and manage their own emotions. With this foundation, […]
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A husband and wife who focus on each other’s negative behaviors are doing what comes naturally. It’s a valuable survival instinct hardwired into the brain. As good as this negativity bias is for survival, a couple who permits it to operate unchecked becomes dissatisfied with their relationship. They fail to notice or lose sight of […]
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