The Best Way to Invest in a Happy Marriage

Few things in life stir up positive and negative emotions as much as the exchanges that occur between a husband and a wife. No one keeps track on a ledger, but those exchanges between spouses always result in deposits in and withdrawals from their individual emotional bank accounts. A happy marriage depends on a couple […]

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15 Promises Missing from Your Marriage Vows

On their wedding day, many couples participate in the exchange of marriage vows. This traditional exchange of promises between soon-to-be husband and wife began as early as the sixteenth century. The vows to love and cherish till death do us part appear in Church of England’s first Book of Common Prayer. I admit that I’ve long […]

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Emotionally Intelligent Husbands Do This Best

An emotionally intelligent husband knows when to accept influence from his wife. By accepting her influence, he increases the chances that he and his wife will share a long and happy marriage. Emotional intelligence is measured by two components. It begins with a person’s ability to recognize, understand and manage their own emotions. With this foundation, […]

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Do This When You’re Focused on Your Spouse’s Negative Behaviors

A husband and wife who focus on each other’s negative behaviors are doing what comes naturally. It’s a valuable survival instinct hardwired into the brain. As good as this negativity bias is for survival, a couple who permits it to operate unchecked becomes dissatisfied with their relationship. They fail to notice or lose sight of […]

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It’s Not Always Your Fault When Your Spouse Gets Upset

Sometimes we step into sensitive areas by mistake and our spouse gets upset. We call it “touching a raw nerve” or “pushing a button.” Many marriage counselors refer to it as a “regrettable incident.” Regrettable incidents occur when an otherwise benign action by one spouse triggers a misfire of a negative emotional reaction from the other. […]

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5 Communication Mistakes to Avoid in Your Marriage

I got angry with my wife for emptying the dishwasher. Normally, that doesn’t happen. In a few seconds, a misguided comment between a husband and wife can explode into a conflict. One or both are in hurry to end the discussion, they’re tired, or their message gets lost in their inability to use the right words. My […]

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How to Keep Chores from Hurting Your Marriage

Sixty-two percent of adults say sharing of household chores is very important to marital success, according to a Pew Research Center poll. But what are husbands and wives to do when they get stuck with chores they don’t like to do? They may carry on for years, silent about their unhappiness or complaining, but doing […]

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Talk about Physical Fitness for a Happier Marriage

My wife and I didn’t talk about physical fitness in our marriage for many years. Like many adults, I added pounds to my waistline as I aged. I’ve since taken those pounds off, but for a few years I was 30 pounds over the recommended weight for my height. My wife never commented on my fat. […]

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Don’t Do This When Your Spouse is Upset

Avoid getting into a habit of trying to cheer up or calm down your spouse when he or she is upset. Your good intentions might lower your odds of having a happy marriage. Let’s turn the tables for a moment. Think about that last time you felt upset and someone tried to cheer you up or […]

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When You Should Use Time-Outs to Save Your Marriage

Pay attention to your body next time you and your spouse get into an argument. What is your physical reaction to marital conflict? In many marriages, verbal conflicts sometimes set off a fight-or-flight or faint-or-freeze response in one or both spouses. These physical reactions are automatic. We don’t consciously choose to activate them. We do need […]

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